Many people see love in simple terms as a contractual agreement. “I will love you if you love me, and you demonstrate love by being nice, buying me gifts, and meeting my companionship and sexual needs.”
Relationships are also agreements about who does what like, “I will clean the house if you pay a percentage of the bills and mow the lawn.” In Sociology, this is called a ‘division of labor.’ Sharing the load is very practical and efficient. Humans do this automatically without giving much thought to the process.
The division of labor agreement has cultural standards concerning male vs. female tasks. Some people are more rigid in their expectations than others. The specific arrangement may be modified, of course, but all relationships have spoken and unspoken contracts at the center and culture dictates some of this. We can ask ourselves questions to gain insight. "How is the division of labor agreement in my relationship different than my parents?" Being aware that these agreements exist is important for avoiding resentments and building a true partnership in which modification of the terms is always on the table for renegotiation.
I understand love as something beyond the contract, division of labor agreement, chemistry, attraction, and affection. Authentic love is an energetic flow given as a gift with no expectation of return. Shared love builds synergistically, becoming something far grander than the sum of each stream combined. Cassandra describes this feeling in the second book.
“I became aware of his energy moving through me, wrapping around my heart and belly and then back to his forming a continuous loop of connection, like a serpentine belt on an automobile engine.” ~ Cassandra, Sergei 2.0
I have fond memories of experiencing love this way. But what if Rupert Spira is correct, and love is not a sharing between two entities but a collapsing of the walls that separate us? What would it be like to surrender in trust completely, to share our very core essence of consciousness with another being? It can't possibly get any more naked than that! And yet, the shame and self-consciousness around being 'naked' are completely gone, because the construct of Me and You would no longer exist and simply become One.
The surrender of the body to a trusted, beloved sexual partner alludes to this. Cassandra finds sexual surrender liberating, freeing her from the overthinking affliction of anxiety. When we are free from thought, what remains is consciousness! Cassandra explores this more in the subsequent books as she matures and grows until she no longer requires the release of sexual ecstasy to maintain peace of mind.
What would a love relationship be like with no walls, a complete melding of consciousness?
Liberation!
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So well said! I surrender....