There are two basic ways to be happy. We could shape the world around us and control everyone in it to accommodate our shifting moods and desires. Or, we could build a stable inner world that relies less on others and external events.
I don't know anyone who ever achieved the first, so let's focus on the second method.
Upsetting situations offer opportunities to self-check when we pull the emotional reaction back to awareness.
Am I irritable? Why am I irritable?
Maybe I didn't get enough sleep last night, skipped breakfast again, drank five cups of coffee to function, and am running late to a job I don't enjoy anymore.
Aha! Now we have something concrete to work with to improve our lives.
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